||[Jun. 11th, 2010|01:10 am]
I sort of love shopping. A lot. Most women do, some women don't. I love the thrill of finding new items, and then wearing them, and then being complimented! What a bonus when it was a real steal and I get to brag, "I got it for only ___ dollars!!!". . . What is it about women and doing that? Every girl I know does it. Anyway. I have always craved clothes, I don't like wearing anything twice, except for the exceptionally beautiful pieces. |
I am inspired by beauty. I want to have a beautiful home, with beautiful photo graphs and art work and unique trinkets. I want it to be a cross of a Real Simple and Etsy and Anthropologie rolled into one cozy, beautiful, warm space. I love nature- the mountains, the beach, sunset, and sunrise, trees in every season, flowers, weeds, grass, billowy rain clouds, fluffy white clouds under open meadow spaces.
Even in food, I want creations to be as appetizing to the eye as to the mouth. Perfectly garnished, swirled, and plated.
People, places and things. . . discovering the beauty of it all is my deepest longing and joy. And yet, no matter how many new dresses I buy, or how many perfect sunsets I see, un-cracked cheesecakes I bake, or places I explore, the desire to seek more beauty only grows. I do not feel quenched after my pursuits, but exceedingly parched. I am always left feeling ugly myself, inadequate to capture any of the beauty I experience. And I think this is where I most closely connect to Christ and God the Father. He is maker of all things Beautiful, and Christ's sacrifice encompasses the most extreme beautiful act, and when my hunt for beauty leaves me unfulfilled, it is just further confirmation that my focus is not where it isn't where it ought to be, and that by keeping my mind centered on Him, I might potentially experience beauty like never before.